EPISODE 01
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Episode 1 - Your Creative Edge

EPISODE 01
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Your Creative Edge

Diary of a Tigress | Episode 01

Episode Transcript:

The richness of your inner world emerges from the depths and uniqueness of your soul’s light. This is the creative edge. It’s risky,  it’s rarely comfortable, yet it’s exhilarating, real, and born from within. There‘s plenty of social pressure today to attain (or just project) expert status pretty much from the start. The richest rewards though are in diving deep into your own creative well.

I wanted to start the first podcast episode by bridging a message I  wrote back in 2014 when it was shared hundreds of times online as  a written article, but also update it to the understanding I have now  

- because I remember feeling it for years before I said it & when I  did, these are words women appreciated & needed to hear at the time but the pressure to project expert status went WAY out of control since then!!  

It’s a tricky situation because we want and need financial autonomy as women, yet the temptation to sell the souvenirs from our visits to the underworld, rather than immersing ourselves for real - for how often & how long we actually need to be there for authentic soul growth gets easily compromised in the modern false matrix world.  

Of course, there are ways to get through this & to have the things you really want - both material and immaterial, and I believe it starts with being honest about how much time and energy is spent listening to & creating from your own authentic depths VS  absorbing what everyone else around you is doing and saying.  

It’s not a problem to be inspired and in fact, that’s very healthy to light each other up in the ways that we do……but it really does take a deepening intimacy with Self to listen inside for long enough to tap into something that can be born from within you. 

About original creativity, I want to say there is a way through - to find your own unique way. There are multiple ways to access this level of connection with self, this level of knowing yourself beyond your conditioned personality, and a way I'll be talking to you bout the most is Tigress - because it works, it feels amazing and it’s about extraction from the false matrix - you can actually feel the invisible cords falling off you, being flung off & removed from you in the process. And in the absence of that which covers up the truth of your soul, you get to meet what’s inside you with profound intimacy.

Tigress has definitely been known to be a birthplace of new creative vision, massive lifestyle and career changes for women -  (btw tune into the welcome message just before this episode if you don’t yet know what Tigress is, or you can check out the website too).  

So many times women I’ve never met come up to me and thank me for showing them what’s possible, for helping them create a  totally different life, to trust themselves enough to transform themselves and build a new career, start a family or a new kind of revolutionary movement in their area of focus. 

It is the intimacy with myself that allowed for this, and it’s your intimacy with you that can take you there, whatever that means for you. There’s something you’ve gotta be doing very differently from the stated quo to have it - you can’t just watch Netflix, eat unhealthy food, stay in your comfort zone, have very little connection with your inner world, be constantly scroll social media and keep exposing your mind to mainstream media if you want to awaken your real creative potential - those things are literally designed to dull down human consciousness so you don’t move into what’s really possible for you.  

And we don’t need to feel like we’ve healed everything and are at a perfect place of self-love before what I’m saying is available to -  because self-respect and self-love end up being a pretty effortless result of removing what’s in the way of being present with the magic inside you. It’s literally already there, but maybe you don’t hear it over all the external noise. There is a way to be presentable but it will never be authentic if you try to be polished all the time - everything that’s bland & lacks flavour tends to lack soul.  

The creative process is messy and it’s meant to be. It’s important to have a dedicated space, process and community you can feel ok about being seen as messy in too. If not, you are playing on the surface of what you’ve got, trying in isolation to look like you have it all together, and feeling like an imposter because…..maybe you kind of are. And being at one’s creative edge needs to get messy because it means direct contact with your own raw, unrefined chaos. This is literally the opposite to how to be a good entrepreneur, to tick all the right boxes, or aim for how you must be and look to teach feminine embodiment, as though it’s a set template of things to teach- I’ll get into that in a coming episode by the way.

When it comes to your creative edge, Here in the darkness of your inner world lives the real beauty of your soul. And it’s often an alchemical result of your own suffering, your deepest questions,  your gruelling aloneness, learnings from your inner chaos, lessons from your most fucked up moments & unspeakable initiations –  transmuted into your rebirth. It’s pretty much the opposite to the polished outer version of success so many women are scrambling to attain, trying to use the language of the deep feminine/ of Lilith when they’ve never ventured out of being controlled versions of  Eve (if you haven’t heard me talk about the Eve & Lilith Experience yet, that’s something to tune into later). 

It’s not their fault though, and it’s not your fault if that’s the situation you are in right now - it simply means there is more to discover about you, and maybe it's your time to go deeper than the majority of people around you are able to take you. 

There is currently a saturation of leaders modelling themselves on that rehearsed, rehashed version of someone else’s, and usually, several other people’s templates of thoughts, words and style, and very few, who stand for something more soul-quenching….because  to do that is to risk not being liked, to maybe risk not making the $  seemingly, or having as many followers - yet everyone just wants you to be who you actually are, especially you, right? 

The female entrepreneur movement was meant to happen, and yet it’s often missing something vital to real feminine development.  Saying this at the time I first publicly put out this message was received as controversial and was sometimes misunderstood rather than being received as real talk, and now it is more understood, but still confronting. There are more women than ever before wanting to build their online professional profiles, and there’s also more than ever before who work in the Sacred  Feminine area - there’s more of both because these things have now hit mainstream populations, but before it’s all about what you can do for everyone else…….. doing it in the ways you think you should, wanting to show everyone who you are - first you’ve gotta show yourself too. The main message here is: In our quest for lifestyle freedom, let’s not forget where freedom, where our  Sovereignty really comes from.

What if it were doing yourself and the world a great disservice to rush this process of inner transformation? Why? Because getting fortified in the fires of your Underworld is not something we can rush, even if we want to. That aliveness from the deep doesn’t give a damn about your urgency to get followers, to have a passive income or validation from anyone or anything outside of you. In fact, She’s likely to keep you down there for longer until you get the message to not define yourself from anything of the world matrix.  Leverage the matrix to your advantage by all means, but if the majority of your attention gets consumed by it, you are only going to be tapping into a fraction of what’s possible for you. And your true feminine light is REALLY needed here. 

All women have their own version of descent to the Underworld.  It’s part of the story of the female psyche developing into the maturity of individuation in this dimension. From the organic process of integrating that Underworld journey, Persephone naturally will emerge as Hecate - Queen of the Underworld – friend to her own instinctual forces – Queen of her own domain - self-defined, fierce, magnetic, heart open and whole.  

Not only are there consequences for skipping over that process when it comes for us, but it’s also the allegiance and attachment to external recognition that can cut a woman off from the true magic of her own creative well. The opportunities available in today’s world are fantastic, yet those things will never nourish the depths of your soul. Creation is a spiral – it’s not a linear process, because you are in the arms of Life itself. Unlike your coach or mentor, you can’t just 

fire Her, the mystery itself, if you in your urgency to be seen by others as powerful, decide you don’t like the process anymore. 

You can feel when someone is really tapping into their magic because you will instinctively take a deeper breath from the aliveness they radiate. They have you sit at the edge of your seat because their frequency pierces through the veil of mediocrity. It brings new life that naturally awakens your own soul wisdom. To embody it can feel like standing/dancing alone, wild, naked, in the centre of the Universe, seeing deeply into the ecstatic dark eye of the abyss.  

Meeting this primordial place can even feel like the very edge of sanity in moments, as you go where there are no maps. And so it takes courage, serious ovaries and a longing that penetrates your very being to find yourself there.  

I know for sure that Tigress offers the kind of sanctuary needed, to support you in being a huntress of your own creative source. When you find yourself there, you not only get to drink deeply of that well  – so does the whole world. 

The secrets of how to live from that fecund place of deep magic aren’t revealed to those who imitate other people’s hard-won creativity. Not because there is a judging entity watching over misguided turns on the road, but because they aren’t available to receive their own gifts while their attention is caught up with comparison or stepping on other peoples magic to get what they want. Rarely does the work of copy-cats really fly, because they don’t have the energy or substance of vision to sustain their imitation of someone else’s work - what comes from God is protected like that. 

Here are some key indicators to know whether you are regularly at  your creative edge: 

* The majority of your inspiration is drawn from within, from the  potent experiences in your personal life & from the pulsing  aliveness of nature Herself

* You deeply value the organic feminine spiral of creation & you  voluntarily surrender to Her deep magic 

* You don’t consume other people’s offerings with the intent or  behaviour to covertly use their content without their permission/  or without crediting them 

* You naturally maintain a genuinely loving relationship with your  mentors/ creative muses/ coaches you personally met who have  helped you free up your energy 

* You want the good things to live your life to the fullest, yet you  don’t sacrifice the health of your feminine soul to attain the shiny  things 

* You are honest enough to be conscious of where you get hooked into the momentum of the matrix world. You are vulnerable and self-loving enough to seek guidance from those who have gone  before you 

* you go deep with practice just for you to receive and cultivate  yourself with - separate to or in addition to what you do for work  if you are a teacher yourself especially  

* you maintain your own inner experience of ego dissolution & real  intimacy with the fires of transformation, in ways that have  nothing to do with your professional profile - you don’t go there  to fill your Instagram with pictures of it, there is something entirely  to nourish your inner sanctum that does not leave your private  personal space - it has no one else’s eyes on it 

And so now, where do you choose to be in all of this?  Do you trust that you can both have a professional profile AND stay deeply engaged in your real soul work?  

You get to do this however you want. It’s entirely of your own creation, of course! Even if your work or personal style is not at all weird or confronting or spiritual as such, the expansive energy behind the unleashed creatress spirit, is what so many women are hungry for.

Please know that your creative edge opens cosmic doors for more women to find their own magic - that kind of beauty from your inner world, is something that heals us all........ and I know you have it in you because as a woman you are here s a conduit for the cosmic mother, in your own unique way.  

Some think they feel a bit scared of this message, and stand I take for us as women in this way, but what they fear is likely to be their own relationship with the unknown. And can be kinda scary in moments but this is where real life is! 

I take a stand for women finding their own unique creativity because I deeply believe in the capacity of every single woman who comes to meet herself truly. I know there is more for you. I see it so clear for you.  

And it will feel less scary when in the right environment to help you face fears that actually are your own doorways to freedom - with all these years of going deep with people privately in transformation group processes, I have learned that what I unapologetically bring is unshakeable faith in the primordial life force energy that animates us. I have a deep belief in the coherence that comes out of chaos,  and in how our light shines even brighter when we are not afraid of the dark.  

I hope this little chat about the creative edge helps you find the courage to lean way into it because nothing gets through into this physical world without us women actually birthing it or somehow nurturing it into being. Shakti is essential for life and so we have an enormous responsibility with this power of creation we are gateways for. And when we good-hearted women know ourselves as that, we have the power to change this world.

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